Well I have not gotten HIGH in several days. Also the VA says that I can get into treatment in less than 2 wks.I hope it's soon. The fear is still with me. Fear that I won't go in and also that I really don't want to quit. Hell I love getting HIGH, it's the consequences I don't want.I do want a LIFE and NOT USING is the only way. Di sent me a message about going to Vegas in Oct. and I replied I wanted to be there.It's a group thing , but those are the type of things I'm talking about doing. Going places doing something other than sit at home and watching tv.God wants something more of meI believe that in prayer I'll find what it is, but only if my mind, body and soul are free of drugs.Today on the way to the library someone told about where I could get some food ( I"m almost out). It is a church that helps a person 1 time every 6 mos. But one of the question asked on the application was What do believe about salvation? My answer was that a belief in JESUS and true repentance is a MUST. I will attempt to post everyday until I leve for treatment.